Thursday, December 31, 2009

Obsessions



Are not healthy.

Except when it comes to You.

Today I experienced the thought of another stating that all obsessions are bad.
Even You.
I had to chain the smile that grew on my lips.

Oooooh, but our obession with You is what You crave most!

Cast your eyes upon his Word written through man.

Oooooh, how He loves us. Every part of Him wants us to walk alongside.
To court like a lover,
To romance us,
To tell us how lovely we are & what strength we have.

Our hearts will obsess over You just as Yours do over us!

If every day, I see your face.
In every dead, every action, every thought,
I will be quite at peace.

Oooooh, how you don't know what joy your heart is missing!

Wednesday, December 30, 2009

Don't you realize?

You're headed nowhere.

You may think you are...

Perhaps elation will come,
But minus a maker,
Filled only with earthly desires,
Will not Forever make.

The path of the world...unfullfilling.
His light...epic. Totally worth it.

When will you learn?

Stretched animal hide is happiness
But it won't last.

Take control,
But realize that ultimately, it's not up to you.
(Thank goodness...)

Explore. Create. Imagine.
But don't bind yourself.

This is why it can't work.
Don't linger, it won't stay.
Don't linger, it won't stay.

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

Pasts


Are judgemental.
They hinder, they blame.
They make us hateful & regret.

Pleasure & pain rolled into one.
To forget, or to remember?
Where is the line?

Let it go,
Give it to God.

LET IT GO.

Give it to God.

Monday, December 21, 2009


"We are captivated by beauty because it reminds us of an Eden which we have never known, but somehow in our hearts know we were created for."- Captivating

Women are the reflection of God.

We define ourselves by our relationships to others.
Is she doing well?; is he alright?

Adam came first, from the flesh of the earth. And yet, God did not stop there.

"It is not good that man should be alone."
Beauty, curves, long flowing hair'
The greatest of all finales!
Together, they walked.
Not "Adam walked" or "He gave Adam His commands."
Together.
With God.
Forever.

But our God is not always an upfront God.
He wishes for our desires, the things which we seek to be hard to find.
Mountains are here so we could learn to climb.
Rivers exist so we may learn to swim.
And just because we don't see God, doesn't mean He is not here.

If God made it easy to believe in Him, there wouldn't be faith.
The very definition of faith implores us to believe in something we cannot fathom.
Trust.
Hope.

"It is the glory of God to conceal a matter, to seek it out is the glory of the kings."-Proverbs

Believe. Seek. And THEN, only THEN, you shall find.

Friday, December 18, 2009



Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered. It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never fails.
Corinthians 13 : 4 - 8

We are Yours,
All Yours,
Entirely Yours.

Sometimes as we walk, we doubt.
Ourselves,
You.

We may not be the best,
The most devoted,
The most pure.

But you chose us.
We of little faith,
Of self-centeredness,
Of human form.

We doubt our own abilities,
We doubt YOUR abilities.
Your abilities in us.

But no rabbi calls a child to be his disciple without knowing in his heart of hearts that that child can be great beyond all measure.

Have faith, we are called.
And we will always win.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Ah, the future

What does it hold?

A life of happiness awaits us,
But only if we seek it,
Make it.

Five years from now, not a glimpse of similarity.
All we have is now.

All who hail together now shall find new beginnings,
New friends,
New towns.

With spouses,
Creating new families.

Trying to drive a wayward pony through the tall fields of life.
No easy task, mind you.

Great appreciation for everyone of the now, no doubt.
But over the sunrise, only a handful will remain.

People are always cycling in and out of our lives.
I hope the ones I wish to be standing there will be.
Oh, they will be.
They always will be.

(Note-this picture is of former classmates of mine. The girl with the dark hair was in a near-fatal car accident. This was the day she left rehab...8 months later. Her friend Lindsey's face...shows it all. We admire your fighting spirit, Liz.)

"She loves that little girl"



You make everything right just by smiling.

You changed everything just by being born.

Even though I don't get to see you as often as I wish, I always think of you,

Dream,
Wish,
Hope.

Nothing is more innocent than a sweet baby girl.

Full of wonder,
Promise,
LIFE.

Even to be a small part of that...
An honor. Truly.

Grow big & strong.
Take on the world, baby.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

I wonder...














Where is the husband God made for me?

I want to run, yet I want to walk.
I wish to swim, yet wish to float.
I crave to fly, yet crave to hover.

Lilah Kate, Cassandra, Violet, Adella, Lorelei, Vera, Eve.
Elias, Gideon, Oliver, Leo, Finn, Jonas, Malachi.

Shall I find him soon? Perhaps. I hope...

I love to love.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009













"Let us go forth into this world,
not knowing where we go,
but only that Your hand will be there to guide us."

-Christmas With Wartburg narration

I gave it all for you.














So it would never end here.

Child of wonder, child of hope, child of God.

I don't like the cold or the driving...


But snow...
Is so beautiful.

Each flake dances around like a ballerina outside my window.
It excites me like a child delights in a new toy.

Hot cups of cocoa & stories by the fire.
Stockings of presents & shiny candy canes.
Wrapped up in fleece blankets with loved ones close,
Shimmering under a brightly-colored carosel of rainbow lights.

Sledding, anyone?

Monday, December 7, 2009

A lot has changed recently,


I feel a bit broken.

As if something was ripped from me.

When it was never fully there at all.
I only thought it was.

Perhaps I was foolish to believe in perfect love stories.

However, I'll pick myself up,
Adopt the heart of a child,
And forget the hurt.

I admit...

I'm kinda,
Sorta,
Maybe,
Just a little bit,
Intrigued by you.

Are you of me too?

I really, truly, deeply, completely
Want to get to know you.

Who knows, maybe we'll both make a happy ending.

Ever feel like this?


Most of the time, my brain says after college...
Work,
Family,
Pay the bills,
Find stability in life.

And at others...

Go live in some far-off country,
Find whatever medical-related job you can get,
Teach your kids the value of spontaneity.

Of adventure.
Of the craziness that ensues you.

Oh, which shall I choose?

This I do know: I never, ever want to have an ordinary day.

Peace, hope, joy, LOVE.

I have come to realize...


His fingerprints are everywhere.

Every leaf,
Every snowflake,
Every carefully constructed individual, formed so gently in the palm of His hand.

Every note of music we play,
Every canvas we caress with a brush.

All are His. Every last one of them.

And yet, we sometimes get wrapped up in this world. We take credit for ourselves. We try to take control of our own lives, forgetting that they were never really ours to begin with.

"The steps of the godly are directed by the Lord. He delights in every detail of their lives. Though they stumble, they will not fall, for the Lord holds them by the hand." Psalm 37:23-24

"Do not let yourself become tied up in the affairs of this life." 2 Timothy 2:4

"Commit to the Lord whatever you do, and your plans will succeed." Proverbs 16:3

Are y'all hearin' this right?!

The God of ALL CREATION is by your side.
Live for Him, He will live for You.
He will never leave you or forsake you.
If you seek, you shall find.

Marvelous.

Sunday, December 6, 2009

Oftentimes


I feel the music.


Softly singing, triumphantly ringing, it echos in my soul like a long lost friend.


A day without music is like a day without breathing.

Breathe in...build on it.

Breathe out...vibrate the overwhelming joy.

When times are hurried and music is lacking, I sorely miss it. Return to my childhood with me, will you?

Long black dresses, candles & soft lights,
Cellos & tubas, my father's white baton dancing like a snowflake,
Singers glance at eachother through steady eyes, careful to stay still.
A bond that never fades, their voices join as one.
And an audience that drinks it all up like a starving child gulps water.

This is my life, the only one I have ever lived. The one I choose, forevermore, to love.

Come with me.

She is...


My goddaughter.

My light in the darkness,
my hope for the future,
my sweet little song.

Children are such a blessing.

They create, they destroy.
They build up hearts,
Make bank accounts smaller.

Always give bliss,
Always receive love.

They make my heart full of overwhelming joy. I could sing of my love for them forever & ever.

They come to bring a renewed sense of life,
Of hope,
Of peace,
Of....
EVERYTHING.

God's little promises that life will be ok.
...and the beat goes on.